


Taste the Bitterness

by HiddenOne



Category: Glee
Genre: ...Sebastian angst...?, M/M, Spoilers up to Naked Episode
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-04
Updated: 2013-02-04
Packaged: 2017-11-28 03:57:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,342
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/670008
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HiddenOne/pseuds/HiddenOne
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>False positive. </p>
<p>All of their hard work, all the hours of practice, all the lifting of weights and the running around the track. All the sweat and the pain and the tears (none of Sebastian’s, but even he came close one practice). All the time spent perfecting choreography and making sure their voices were solid. None of that mattered, because it all came down to the so-unlikely-it’s-almost-impossible false positive.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Taste the Bitterness

**Author's Note:**

> Warnings for slightly bitter author and half-hearted editing...

False positive.

All of their hard work, all the hours of practice, all the lifting of weights and the running around the track. All the sweat and the pain and the tears (none of Sebastian’s, but even he came close one practice). All the time spent perfecting choreography and making sure their voices were solid. None of that mattered, because it all came down to the so-unlikely-it’s-almost-impossible false positive.

The allegations had been crap – none of the Warblers could believe that Trent had been that angry at Hunter kicking him out that he made up a story about steroids. Hunter _had_ given them creatine, but it’s a protein supplement that’s perfectly legal and isn’t even injected. Yet the allegations alone are enough to permanently damage the Warbler’s reputation, especially since it conveniently coincides with Hunter’s higher caliber competition standards. Just the rumor of the slushie incident had the Dalton administration evoking Sebastian’s title of captain as Trent very well knew. The steroid accusations cause even bigger waves.

Sebastian had been _relieved_ when the issue had gone to trial. A test for performance enhancers would prove them in the clear and at least they could still compete. When his, _his_ test result comes back positive his heart skips a beat.

Everything happens so quickly after that. The Warblers are kicked out of the competition. All of them are sentenced time spent at a rehab clinic. Hunter has his days booked with meetings with the Dalton administration before the judge reaches the end of the verdict.

Sebastian’s are the only results that come back positive, but it is enough proof to convict the entire team.

He can’t even find the words to protest – when he tries, the absolute loathing on his teammate’s faces is enough to shut him up immediately. His throat burns and he desperately tries to keep from crying. He doesn’t know what to do or why this has happened to him. His mind returns to the slushie and the suicide and wonders if he will ever be able to make up for his mistakes.

The Warblers don’t even make it out of the courthouse before Sebastian is dragged to the men’s bathroom and slammed up against the wall. Hunter normally has a short temper and all the pressure and stress from everyone has had him on edge for the past month. Sebastian isn’t taken by surprise at the aggression.

“What did you take,” Hunter growls right in his face. “What? Some energy drink? Some pill at Scandals? _What?_ ”

“Nothing,” Sebastian answers. “Nothing, Hunter. I swear,” his voice is pleading but he doesn’t even care. Hunter knows he didn’t take steroids, he believes him. He doesn’t know what triggered the positive result but he didn’t take anything unusual or unknown since Hunter put his rules in place months ago. Hunter _knows_ he wouldn’t screw this up.

“Then why are your results positive?” Hunter still presses Sebastian up against the wall but his voice is less harsh.

Sebastian desperately wants to give Hunter the answer. He wants to know where he went wrong. He can’t apologize without giving a reason and he can’t change if he doesn’t know how. “I don’t know,” he whispers, unable to look Hunter in the eye.

“Re-test,” Hunter orders. “You didn’t take anything. Get a re-test.”

Sebastian nods obediently but the idea of a second test isn’t nearly as comforting as it should be. The first test was supposed to be proof that he and the Warblers are innocent, instead it proved him guilty. What if the second is positive as well?

It doesn’t matter that Sebastian submits himself for a second test immediately. It doesn’t matter that the drugs wouldn’t have had enough time to leave his system before the second test. It doesn’t matter that the second is negative proving the first a false positive. The Show Choir Board has made their ruling and refuses to rescind their decision. The Warblers don’t have to go to rehab, but it’s a miniscule compensation.

Sebastian’s test was a false positive yet no one but Hunter believed he didn’t actually take steroids. The looks of the rest of the Warblers faces said it all and even when the dust settles Sebastian can’t stand to talk to them. It doesn’t make hi m feel better that his teammates apologize and say if they had really thought about it, they know that Sebastian would never cheat. Not after the events of last year.

It’s _because_ of last year they all believed he did.

Sebastian thinks the New Direction’s old coach – not the army drop-out one, the one before – is sleeping with someone because the Board obviously rescinded their decision for New Directions disqualification and there’s no reason not to rescind their decision regarding the Warblers. They cite the rule that the Warblers aren’t officially cleared until after Regionals, the paperwork of bureaucracy being their downfall.

Sebastian sits at the Lima Bean, staring at his coffee and he stirs it. ‘Life is unfair,’ is his father’s advice when Sebastian wants him to push for the Warbler’s reinstatement. The State’s Attorney of Ohio has better things to do with his time. There’s only a small little newspaper clip about them being cleared of all charges – everyone loves the public school underdogs over the rich privileged school boys. It doesn’t even matter how rabid the dogs are, Sebastian realizes.

Sebastian looks up when someone sits at the table across from him. He immediately composes himself when he realizes it’s Blaine, but he doesn’t smirk his usual greeting.

“…Hey Sebastian,” Blaine begins after a moment of silence.

Sebastian nods in response before focusing more on putting his lid back on his coffee so he can drink it. It’s probably too cool by now, but he needs something to do so it isn’t obvious that he can’t stand to look at Blaine.

“Look, I’m sorry about what happened with the Warblers. I wish that it hadn’t happened to you guys,” Blaine starts.

“Is this your official apology?” Sebastian interrupts, because frankly it sucks as one. It may have taken him longer than it should have, but at least last year he gave a decent one when he finally owned up to his mistakes. He would think Blaine would have more practice – or maybe not, not if he’s never done anything that he’s needed to apologize for.

“What?” Blaine asks, eyebrows furrowed.

“It was your desire to take down the Warblers that created this whole mess,” Sebastian deadpans. He looks at Blaine and feels nothing but regret that keeps on building. He hates the feeling and wishes he knew how to get rid of it.

Blaine sits back in his chair and makes a sound of disbelief. “ _I_ didn’t _make_ you take steroids,” Blaine says, almost offended.

Sebastian chuckles because this is just unbelievable and he knows no other response. The New Direction’s (Blaine’s) conscience is clear because all they did was their civil duty of taking down the villains. They have their own superhero costumes, what other ending could Sebastian have possibly expected?

Sebastian takes a moment to contemplate throwing this whole mess back in Blaine’s face. Explaining that no, the Warblers didn’t take steroids. How long did it take to convince him that his old friends were cheating to win a _show choir competition_? He wonders if Blaine is relieved that he picked the ‘winning’ side. Would the guilt eat at Blaine, knowing that the Warblers played fair and were still punished? Because of one kid’s jealousy, a false positive, and technical paperwork?

Sebastian leaves the Lima Bean still laughing, leaving Blaine utterly confused at the table. What’s the point in explaining when there’s no chance he’ll be believed?

"Ran into Blaine at the Lima Bean today,” Sebastian tells Hunter that night in their dorm room.

“Huh,” is what he gets in response. When Sebastian doesn’t continue, Hunter prompts “And?”

“I let him believe he’s still the acclaimed hero of legend.”

“He’s not quite so flawless,” Hunter chuckles.

It’s unfair, because Sebastian knows Blaine would feel guilty and would probably even try to get the Warblers reinstated if he knew. Trent did come forward as a witness after all which would be convincing. But life is unfair, Sebastian reminds himself. “No, definitely not flawless,” Sebastian agrees.

Someone who knows someone who knows someone who knows someone actually important gets the Warblers invited to the National Show Choir Competition. They aren’t competitors, of course, because they weren’t cleared until after New Directions won their Regional competition and it would be unfair to the public school losers to take away their place when the events were out of their control. The events were entirely in their control, but no one actually knows that part. When the judges are deliberating their decisions on the finalists, the Warblers are invited to perform as entertainment for the crowd.

Sebastian thinks it’s stupid because everyone is sick of show choirs at that point but Hunter isn’t the type to waste the opportunity. Hunter works them ten times as hard but no one complains. The administration makes them submit to ‘random’ tests for performance enhancers, but the tests are so frequent there’s no actual randomness. If you weren’t tested in the first group at the beginning of the week, you were definitely tested in the second group during the last half. At least the teachers take it easy on them, most of them sympathetic to their plight. Though Mr. Bradbury, the chemistry teacher still side-eyes Sebastian whenever he walks by.

There are still rumors that he has taken stuff and now has finally perfected how to beat the tests. None of the other Warblers are mentioned in the rumors though, just him. Hunter goes off in the locker room when he overhears a football player repeating it, and Hunter barely avoids getting suspended for the resulting fight. Luck is on their side for once that it was Coach Rasen that stopped them – since he’s coach of the lacrosse team he only gave Hunter some detentions.

In the wake of the steroid scandal and Trent’s testimony, his parents had immediately transferred him to McKinley. Surprise surprise, he joined the New Directions and was very happy in his new home. When the Warblers are cleared, the Board decides to suspend Trent from the competition for his false testimony. Sebastian admits he’s a _little_ joyful at that.

The New Directions fall completely apart at the news of Trent’s suspension. The moral crisis of starting the events that got the Warblers disqualified from the competition when they were completely innocent, knowing that they didn’t deserve to compete at Regionals destroys them. Sebastian hears they spend their entire practice arguing and debating, some saying they should hold their heads up high at Nationals since they did win Regionals and others saying they should gracefully step out of the competition in the spirit of fairness. Sebastian doesn’t bother to find out which side Blaine is on.

There are several missed phone calls and unread text messages and unopened Facebook messages from Blaine that Sebastian continues to ignore. He and Hunter just laugh about them, though there really isn’t anything funny about it. Sebastian doesn’t want an apology or an explanation. He doesn’t want to comfort Blaine. He doesn’t want to keep feeling horrible and he can do that best without Blaine.

The only thing Sebastian feels he can really hold on to during this whole mess is Hunter, but he doesn’t say that out loud because it’s nauseating. No one actually says stuff like that. When Hunter gives him a solo for Nationals (and no one else besides Hunter gets one), Sebastian knows that Hunter knows and that’s enough.

The Warblers dominate at Nationals. They are by far the crowd favorite, and are even voted as such in an unofficial polling where they beat the actual crowned champions by over ten percent. Hunter smirks and brags about the results on the local news when they get back home. It’s brought up that the New Directions, who went in the Warbler’s rightful place, completely tanked at Nationals. Hunter responds that it’s hardly surprising given that they were beat out at the Sectionals level. When Trent’s false testimony is mentioned, Hunter references that there had been several Warblers over the years that hadn’t cut it and transferred to McKinley. He just wishes Trent had the courage to do so without accusing the Warblers of cheating.

Sebastian laughs really hard at that and wishes he could see Blaine’s face.

The Warblers throw a party, celebrating their pseudo-win. They don’t have a trophy to hoist and the entire thing feels bittersweet, but there’s no doubt they gave an epic performance. Sebastian pretends to be drunker than he is, faking having fun with people he feels no attachment to. When Hunter finally pulls him aside, he doesn’t protest.

“I like you,” Hunter says, straight and to the point. Sebastian gapes, dropping the pretense of his act.

“You’re straight!” Sebastian argues because every moment between them from when Hunter became captain to now is just Sebastian’s wishful thinking. Sebastian may (definitely) have feelings for Hunter but they would never be returned. He had come to terms with that and had come to see it as his penance.

“Yes,” Hunter agrees. “But I like you.”

Sebastian still gapes because he doesn’t know what to do. He’s afraid to even breathe in case it ruins everything.

“I want to kiss you.”

Sebastian nods. They kiss once and it’s slow and chaste. They kiss again, a little bit deeper. They kiss a third time and Sebastian wraps his arms around Hunter and clings. He doesn’t think he’s capable of letting go.

The Warblers cheer but Sebastian doesn’t even care. Hunter pulls back – just a little, he doesn’t leave the circle of Sebastian’s arms – and smiles widely. Sebastian smiles back and swears that he will do everything he can to keep this forever.

“I like you too.”

“Good.”

Maybe there is such a thing as a second chance.

 


End file.
